Thoughtful Discussion

You give feedback to help team embers. Sometimes the person receiving your feedback may become defensive, resistant, or contrary. This game involves a thoughtful discussion of useful tips for giving effective feedback.

Purpose

To thoughtfully discuss different tips for giving effective feedback.

Synopsis

Ask the players to take turns to read tips for giving effective feedback and to discuss each tip. Instruct a player to rank different people’s contributions during the discussion.

Players

  • Minimum: 5

  • Maximum: Any number, organized into groups of 3 to 7 plyers.

  • Best: 10 to 30

Time

10 to 30 minutes, depending on the number of players in each group.

Handout

Giving Effective Feedback. Make a copy of the handout (included after this article) for each player.

Supplies and Equipment

  • Small pieces of paper

  • Pens

  • Timer

  • Whistle

Room Set-up

Arrange seats around tables to permit group discussions.

Flow

Brief the players. Tell the players that they are going to explore a set of tips on giving effective feedback. You will discuss one tip at a time.

Distribute the tips. Give each player a copy of the handout with the 10 tips for giving effective feedback. Ask the players to silently read the tips and reflect on them.

Organize groups. Divide the players into groups of 3 to 7 people.

Suggest discussion questions. Recommend that the players use questions to structure their discussion. Present these questions:

  1. How would you explain this tip in your own words?

  2. How would you encourage someone to use this tip?

  3. What personal examples do you have of the tip in action?

  4. Among your colleagues, who is already using this tip?

  5. What are the advantages of using this tip?

  6. What could be some potential dangers in applying this tip?

  7. How would you rewrite this tip into an easy-to-recall slogan?

Start the first round. In each group, ask the players to identify one person to be the first Reader. Instruct this player to read any one of the 10 tips. Ask the group to begin their discussion of this tip.

Conclude the first round. Suggest a 3-minute time limit. At the end of three minutes, blow the whistle to conclude the discussion. Ask the Reader to think back on the value of the contributions from the other players. On different pieces of paper, ask the Reader to secretly write the numbers 1, 2, 3, ... to rank each player according to the value of their contribution. Give this example: If there are four other players, the person who made the most valuable contribution is ranked 1 and the person who made the least valuable contribution is ranked 4. Ask the Reader to fold these slips of paper and place them in front of the appropriate players. Instruct the players not to open the folded pieces of paper.

Continue the discussions. In each group, ask the player seated to the right of the previous Reader to assume the role of the new Reader. Continue the discussion and the scoring procedure. Repeat the procedure to give all players an opportunity to be the Reader.

Conclude the last round. After every player in each group has had a chance to be the Reader, announce the end of the activity.

Identify the winner. Ask the players to open the slips of paper and add the numbers. In each group, the player with the smallest total is the winner. Identify these winners and congratulate them.

Reuse the Activity

Use the structure of Thoughtful Discussions to explore any important soft-skill topic. Create a handout with 10 useful tips and feed it into the structure of this activity.

Handout

Giving Effective Feedback

1. Choose suitable time and place for giving feedback. Make sure that you will not be interrupted in the middle of this important conversation.

2. Don’t beat around the bush. Don’t use the sandwich approach (positive feedback-negative feedback-positive feedback). It merely dilutes the impact of your feedback.

3. Focus on the gap between ideal behavior for achieving the goals and actual behavior of the person receiving the feedback.

4. Give feedback directly to the person who should receive it. Don’t delegate the responsibility or talk behind the other person’s back.

5. Give feedback in small doses. Too much feedback is as useless as too little feedback. The receiver of your feedback may feel overwhelmed.

6. Give feedback, not advice. If the other person asks for advice, start a collaborative problem-solving conversation.

7. Go Socratic. Ask questions instead of making feedback statements. Keep your mind open for receiving alternative perceptions.

8. It’s not a monologue. Encourage the person receiving your feedback to talk back. Conduct a two-way dialogue during the feedback session.

9. Praise in public. But remember: Some introverted people may not like public recognition. Some cultures do not value public acclamation.

10. Ask for feedback on your feedback. Ask the receiver to summarize what you said to check for clarity. Also ask for suggestions to improve the way you give feedback.